Pointless messages on electronic platform boards
I remember a great one at Morden when there was no service Kennington to Morden either way.
The scrolling display said "There is currently no service Morden to Kenn...." and then immediately switched to "No service Northwick Park to Chorleywood because of a person taken ill at Pinner".
For some reason, we never got the full message about the Northern Line.
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