Stuart wrote in message

snip

1) Walk to barrier
2) Realise what that little piece of card they were given half an hour
later is for
3) Open handbag (because it usually is a woman)
4) Rake around in handbag for a bit
5) Get out purse
6) Find ticket in purse

Or then decide to use the next barrier, the one that I had decided to
use a few seconds earlier, and so walk straight in front of me.

In fact I find the most annoying thing about these barriers are women
(invariably) who will try to race you to the barrier and then, when
you've decided to use the neighbouring one (no need to fight over a
barrier when there are two), will stop you doing so by moving straight
in front of you.

We don't need the bloody barriers in any case. Penalty fares and
inspectors would speed things up a lot.

7) Try to insert ticket in top of machine
8) Realise mistake and insert ticket in the front of the machine
9) Stand there for a bit wondering why gates haven't opened
10) Take ticket from machine, gates open
11) Stand there for a bit wondering if it's safe to go through
12) Pass through the barrier

I can tolerate this one because it's more predictable

Paul